Genius

Hula Hoop Puppets - Oh Yes!

Woo-Hoo!!

Howdy Boys & Girls,

Very exciting news, I am now a blogger on 2 websites! I have written a piece for www.gigwise.com and they have put it on their site. Now as Jed will know I was rushed and I kinda wanted to expand more but they really liked it so who cares!!

Have a look and tell me what you think. - "It's Time To Stop MP3 Players Killing Off Albums"

New blog soon,

xx

Pantone have confirmed that it is indeed 'Shocking Pink'

Yes, I have been rubbish with this blog. I apologise profusely for that and will hope to make it up to you all somehow… And on that note, we cue the music:

First things first, I have bought a bike..

To set the scene, I haven’t owned a bike since I was 13ish and never ridden really ridden in the road. Regardless of this, I decided that a BMX would be perfect for me to save money on having to use the bus/tube and good exercise for my marathon training (and secretly I thought that if I got one I would be doing this in no time…..But turns out I think it would be more like this)

I popped down to Re-cycle in Elephant & Castle (I recommend the shop but not the area) and bought myself a shocking pink BMX. As you can see from the pic above 'Rosita'* is quite a looker, and although I friend of mine did point out that it looks like I have stolen a little girls birthday present, it has already got me out of some scrapes.

Having done a couple of short rides down to the shops and through the park to meet a friends, I was fairly confident with my ‘mad skills’ and yesterday decided to go for a longer ride to another part of town.

Mistake.

Riding on main roads with no cycle lane on a bike that could fit inside a Christmas cracker is utterly terrifying. I now know why BMXrs wear those full-face masks: to hide the look of sheer mind-numbing terror that is on their face (Kinda like this fat kid)

Due to this terror, I began to snake on and off the pavement. I was all going swimmingly until I turned a corner and ran into a Community Support Officer. On the pavement.

He called me to one side, made me take off my sunglasses and the conversation genuinely went like this:

CSO: “ Why are you riding on the pavement?”

RLP: “Because I don’t want to get hit by a car, Officer.”

C: “Do you know it is illegal to cycle on the pavements in The Royal Borough of Kensington and Chelsea?”

R: ”No Sir, I did not.” (I honestly didn’t know it was illegal)

C: “Is this your bike?”

R: ”Yup.”

C: “Do you actually own this bike?”

R: “Yes Sir.”

C: “Why do you own a pink bike?”

R: “I think you'll find it is ‘shocking’ pink..”

C: “Why do you own a pink bike.”

R: “Because it’s cool.”

C: “It’s not cool. Girls have pink bikes”

R: “True, but men have ‘shocking’ pink bikes..”

This back and forth continued as we discussed the connotations of having a bike with such a hue until he let me off the £30 fine due to the fact that he - and I quote - "Felt sorry for me and my pink bike."

Me + Rosita* = An unstoppable force…


xx



* You must put your finest Hispanic accent whilst saying it.


P.S To tide you over -

• Webcam Window Fall
• Sporcle - Good pocrastination fodder. Especially like Mambo N0.5 (Got all of them, oh yeah), Mr Carlins 7 Dirty words (All 7) & Death Words (only 23)

Quick Note..

Proper post tomorrow but to tide you over:

A) Gotta love the stupidity of the BNP
B) Russian Roof Jumping - Watching him psych himself up is brilliant but if you are in a rush, skip to about half way..

xx

Mmmmm… Food?

Don’t get me wrong; while I love a lot of Japanese food (Sushi: amazing, Sashimi: yum, Teriaki, Soba noodles etc), fully traditional Japanese food is on the most part, not very nice. For the majority of nights I was over there, I had only traditional meals (using great quality ingredients) cooked at some of the highest standards yet although I forced myself to eat every plate clean to fully immerse myself, I would be lying if I said I didn’t have a gag reflex to a couple of dishes..


So many things are boiled and pickled to within an inch of their life, sucking all the flavour out of it leaving it a useless foodstuff and allowing the fish broth it is usually served in be the only flavour you can taste. And the radishes! There is a type of radish they love serving with various courses that smells like wet dog and tastes even worse. The first time I was served it, I proceeded to wolf down a large “spludge” of it in front of the General Manager of one of the hotels, whom I was dining with (The mixture of shock and awe on his face was priceless after which he told me that it was meant for mixing with your soy sauce, bit late now Ken). Even now it gives me shivers just thinking about it.


OH, AND TOFU!! What is the bloody point in Tofu??? They love it over here and yet it is a flavourless sponge that gets in the way and is extremely hard to pick up with chopsticks when you first start out. Then there is rice tofu, which has all the same quality yet is so chewy that you end up having to swallow it in one half choking yourself.


Having said all that, what I do really respect is the appreciation of the seasons that every chef has when preparing meals. They all try and source food locally and only use fish, veg and herbs that are in season. It is definitely something we could all learn from but it did throw up some curveballs:

The “in season” fish is Eel.

The right word to describe it is ‘interesting’, and falling right into the cliché as its tastes kinda like chicken.

The “in season” vegetable is what they call ‘Mugwort’ – Need I say more? Thought so.

xx

P.S. Jozin and Bazin = Lads

Sorry..

Sorry I still haven't posted yet, have been whacked by J-lag and the general craziness of everything at home, but new post will be up by the end of tomorrow so please keep tuned in as a spanking new post will be on it's way soon....

xx

P.S. They don't make Finnish instructional dance videos like they used to...

Thank You And Oyasuminasai...

Konnichiwa One & All,

I am sad to say that this is my final 'official' blog from Japan before I fly tomorrow.

"Oh-no!" I hear you cry (Well at least mum and that odd random stalker..)

But don't fret as I still have so much more to write about that I didn't get a chance to while I was here, so after a short break for R&R when i get home, I hope to try to write daily for the next week and if i get on a roll (and someone actually reads it), longer.

This is a rubbish final post from Japan I know but I am knackered, a bit emotional (Fell asleep on a train going the wrong way this evening, woke up in the equivalent of Slough outside central Tokyo) and am trying to get up at 4.30am for the Tsukiji fish market

So, nighty night and shall be back in touch soon..

xx

P.S. Godzilla count: 14